Battle with OCD
👋🏼Being vulnerable here... this is really hard for me to talk about but I feel maybe it will speak to someone with the same battle. I was going to post this then changed my mind...back and forth and I am finally doing it! Please send this to a friend if you think they need this ❤️.
I have talked briefly about my testimony of using CBD oil and how it has helped me with my OCD. The last couple of months has been so hard and deep for me. So many tears and feeling frustrated with myself...and I know I have been way too hard on myself and things are just out of my control.
Without getting too in-depth and only saying what I feel most comfortable with(but let’s be real I’m already feeling a little uncomfortable sharing this)... I got to a point with everything being so hard I knew I needed to go into the doctor to get help. I was embarrassed going to my husband to express really how insane I can get inside my head. My OCD has been literally on steroids in my brain and I have not been able to shut it off. My husband was so loving and understanding and it was a relief. I love this man to death and he gets me and has witnessed how a little crazy I get with my OCD 👋🏼🥴.
It’s been a hard pill to swallow(literally lol)getting help and a humbling experience. It’s hard not to feel embarrassed but I know I’m not the only one with the struggle of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I have struggled all my life with it, loosing lots of amount of sleep. Stress that does not need to be there is there. I have always been game for self improvement books to help me find techniques to help work through it all(I might add “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” by Dale Carnegie is amazing).
Since I have gone into the doctor to get medicated I have had a huge burden been lifted. Honestly, the best way to put it is I didn’t realize how much my OCD ruled my life and made it difficult to LIVE. Since I have been on medications for the first time in my life I feel like I can breathe and not be clouded with a 1000 thoughts replaying in my head over and over again.
I really don’t want this to be a permanent thing and hope that I can find tools to help me cope with OCD but I have realized it’s OK to get help.
I have been missing out on a world I didn’t know and I’m taking the time to live and feel more. I have to thank my dad for this. He has been my rock through this and was the one that pushed me to get help. I never would have if it was not for him.
I wanted to share this difficult story with you all in hopes that it will speak to someone and help them. Know your not alone and it’s ok to get help.
I have so much to be grateful for and I am over the moon 🌙 filled with joy that I am able to function with the hard things I’m going through right now. As always thanks for all your love and support. You guys are the best followers!